I believe we can be anyone

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best to make you like everybody else is to fight the hardest battle you can fight--but never stop fighting! E.E. Cummings

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

Chapter 4: From Fear to "F" Off! Let's F'in DO this!

I was told the rappelling would be physically challenging with the weight of the rope, but I had no idea until I was doing it that day.  Looking back now, the practice session at Crux (where we went down seven stories) was a piece of cake compared to this.  I would do that again in a heartbeat.

The rope was extremely heavy and even though I’m in great shape, I found lifting 100 pounds of rope from 30 floors up difficult. But, I had to lift the rope up in order to get down the building.   Heavier people were definitely at an advantage here as their weight would help them go down the building faster.  And of course, experience rappelling makes a difference too.

The first ten floors going down I thought:  “Am I ever going to get down this f’in building?”  Of course I was going to.  But at the time, it felt like forever to me.
 
Starting my descent down with intense focus.  One baby step at a time.  Getting used to pulling the rope up and using the rappelling equipment was a challenge in and of itself!

I could still hear the encouraging voices of the owners from the roof.  I had to stop a few times already as my hands and arms were getting tired from lifting the rope.  I was only a couple floors down at this point!
 
I heard the owners say:  “Just rest for a minute.  Let go.  Now, shake your right hand out.  Now, let go and shake your left hand out.”  And so I did this, despite not wanting to let my hands off the equipment!  But, I realized I needed to take time to rest and recoup because I had a ways to go yet.
 
Every now and again people from their offices would be looking out and be smiling and waving at me.  I would mouth to them:  “This is SO hard!”  They would nod their heads in support. 

It was wonderful, beautiful and surprising to see “strangers” looking out their windows and supporting me in this way, without us "knowing" each other.

 
I may have been cursing here at this point.  I don't remember.  LOL
 
 
 
Somewhere around the tenth floor, I couldn’t hear anyone from the roof and I couldn’t hear anyone from the bottom.  It was quiet.  It was just me and my thoughts, my determination and my persistence to keep me going.




 

Thankfully, the weight of the rope lessened and it got easier the further I got down.  Being a tiny person and not having a lot of experience rappelling, it seemed to take a long time. 

But, I realized, it wasn’t about competing or racing with anyone.  Dropzone, for me, is a metaphor for life.  This was about me and my own journey.  At some point in a person's life, ultimately, it's all up to me and how I'm going to choose to live my life .... TO BE CONTINUED.

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